Stop People Pleasing: 3 Easy Steps to Speak Your Truth
“No is a complete sentence.”
Harriet B. Braiker, The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome
🚦 My Wake-Up Moment at the Parent-Teacher Meeting
A few years ago I sat in a tiny classroom chair during my son’s conference. The teacher listed all the things he “needed to improve.”
I smiled, nodded, and promised, “We’ll work on it.”
On the drive home a tight knot formed in my chest. I had once again traded my voice for approval.
A question popped into my mind:
What if trying to please everyone is the very thing keeping me from helping anyone, including myself?
That question led to the practice I teach today. If I can break the cycle, you can too. 🌱
❓ Why We Say “Yes” When We Mean “No”
Old survival habit – As kids we learn that approval feels safe.
Fear of rejection – We worry that “no” means being left out.
Hidden reward – We feel important when we fix other people’s problems.
The price we pay: stress, silent anger, and a lost sense of who we are.
🧘♀️ 3 Simple Steps to Let Go of People Pleasing
Give yourself ten quiet minutes. Soft music helps.
1. Feel Supported 🤲
Sit tall and notice the chair or bed under you. Take a slow deep breath. Say in your mind, “I am safe.” Safe people do not need to earn love with endless yeses.
2. Shine Light on Tension ✨
Imagine warm light flowing in through the top of your head and moving through every muscle. Where does it get stuck? Maybe in your throat or chest. Picture the light wrapping that spot in calm. Tell the tension, “Thank you for trying to protect me.”
3. Take One Brave Baby Step 🐾
Think of the last time you felt pushed to say yes. Replay the scene, but this time see yourself pause and say a kind truth.
Examples:
“Let me think about that.”
“I’m not able to commit right now.”
“I need a moment to decide.”
Feel the calm in your body as you honor your need. Small wins create new habits.
🗣️ A Quick Mantra to Try
“My worth is solid. My yes and my no both come from love.”
Repeat it morning and night for three weeks. Your nervous system will start to believe you.
🌈 Picture Your Future Self
Close your eyes and picture a day when:
You wake up without the knot in your chest.
You set a boundary and feel respect, not guilt.
Your relationships feel balanced, giving and receiving in equal measure.
Hold this picture for sixty seconds. The brain treats vivid images like practice for real life.
🚀 Ready for More Support?
Here’s where to start:
Take the Abundance Mindset Quiz—a quick diagnostic that reveals:
Which anxiety loop grips you most
Where subconscious patterns hijack your focus
The exact tool to start rewiring today
👉 Take the Quiz Here
It’s time to shift your anxiety story from fear… to freedom.
🌱 Quick Reflection
Think of your last automatic “yes.” What tiny change will you try next time? Write it down or share in the comments. Naming it starts the shift.
To Your Victory,
Pennie – Mental Fitness and Hypnotherapy Coach 💞
